Lord Of The Trips To Mackay: An Epic Journey

Good gravy ladies & gentlemen.  So, what did you do with your day?  I did a few things.  I played the latest Tales of Monkey Island game, I decided to try parting my hair on the opposite side,

Parting is such sweet sorrow.

It looks like a comb over.

I had my first rehearsal for my upcoming trip to Singapore, (expect blog updates about that) & I GOT MY CAR BACK!!!!!  For those of you who don’t know, all of this week, until this morning, I had been… without a car.  That’s right, carless, immobile, Ohne auto.  Sonder ‘n motor.  車を使わずに.  But this very morn I received my automobile back.  This in itself is not the greatest news received on planet earth today but it does bring to a close a small saga that has been going on in my life for the past few weeks.  That would be my trip home to Mackay.

The Fellowship Of The People In Mackay

Like all good stories this one begins on a bright summer’s day in a small, sleepy town where it’s best if people don’t go outdoors.  (In The Shire it’s because you never know where the wind might take you.  In Mackay it’s because you never know who’s waiting to hit you over the head with a broken bottle.)  My mother decided it would be a good idea for me to visit home.  I can’t deny I missed my family & was genuinely keen to spend a weekend with them so when Mum offered to book me tickets to fly home I leapt at the opportunity.  After a bit of deliberation we randomly decided upon the weekend of March 5th-7th.  Everything was going along swimmingly until, about two weeks out from heading back to Mackay I received an email about an audition for a show I really wanted to be in.  Those of you who are involved in theatre know that when an audition comes around you move heaven & hell to get there.  Only if they are in your way of course.  If they aren’t it just seems like a waste of time you could spend practicing.  I instantly called the theatre company to see if I could audition on another day but unfortunately they were only doing one day of auditions & March 7 was that day.  I called my mother & advised her of the situation.  We were both sad but it was a simple matter of booking flights for the following weekend.

I got through my audition & began looking forward to the weekend ahead.  Fate on the other hand had different plans in mind.  *Insert Suspenseful Diminished Chord Here*  A day or two after the audition I got an email saying we would have to come back in for callbacks… ON THE FOLLOWING SUNDAY!!!  Needless to say there was a flurry of phone calls & my mother & I decided we would have to change the flights again.  The only problems were that we had to find out how much it would cost & when we could change flights to & most of all… I’m incredibly lazy & always procrastinate about these kind of things.  This really posed a problem on Thursday night when there was only 22 1/2 hours left until my flight & I still hadn’t changed them.  (You need at least 23 hours notice to change a flight.)  Mum & I decided to keep the first flight as is & just fly back early on the Sunday morning.  Once again things were as they should be.

The Two Hours To Get To The Airport

The morning of my flight arrived & I just had to deliver some computers to Toowoomba & head back home.  Sounds simple enough right?  Wrong!  A couple of hours before I had to be walking through the airport security checkin I was driving home along the Ipswich Motorway & my gearbox decided it couldn’t take life anymore & exploded itself.  So there I was, two hours from needing to be at the airport, sitting 3 inches from cars & trucks travelling 100Km/hr & unable to move.  I called RACQ, who said I would have to wait for two different tow trucks, & proceeded to wait patiently as fast as possible.  A traffic response unit pulled up behind me & told me that the truck would be an hour.  Because of the dangerous position we were in he gave them a hurry up & I received an updated time of 20 minutes.  Finally, my luck had started to change.  They ended up taking an hour.

Return of the Good Luck

Here is where my luck REALLY started to change.  To begin with the first tow truck turned out to be the only tow truck.  Emergency tow trucks are only allowed to tow you to safety.  Fortunately the guy I got knew of an RACQ approved mechanic within towing distance.  Fortunately the mechanic had a staff member away at a wedding.  “But Luke why is that fortunate?”  Because the guy who was away was replaced by someone who lived out past… wait for it… THE AIRPORT!!!  That’s right.  I managed to bump into the only mechanic/human/thing in existence that was driving from Wacol to the Brisbane Airport to go home from work that afternoon.  I don’t think I need to tell you that I was excited.  OK so I didn’t have any clothes to take with me.  Fortunately I keep a few spare changes of clothes in Mackay with my family.  Dang it… how could I possibly prepare for my call back audition when I hadn’t been home to get everything I needed?  Fortunately I had my music in the car with me.  What about your camera?  You would not be able to take photos of things while you are in Mackay!  Fortunately my boss had recently loaned me his old Nokia E71 which takes great photos for a camera phone.

Just a little under an hour after I got to the mechanic’s I was at the airport just in time to get my boarding pass printed out & head through security.  Here I am celebrating.

Me celebrating.

I don't think this angle really captures my joy.

After I had mailed the 12 inch screwdriver I found in my bag back home, I kicked back, ate a fish burger, immediately regretted it, boarded my plane & made it to see my family

Relaxing at my parent's house

This lighting makes me look so slim.

& my #1 girl.

My #1 girl

Such a bad photo. You can't even see our feet!

& I lived happily ever after.

Lord Of The Rings Style Superfluous Ending

The mechanics who had my car got sent the wrong gear box which meant it was up in the air for much longer than it should have been.  I was really worried about being able to pay for the repairs until I looked at my savings account & found an extra $1000 in it.  Needless to say I thought this was a good thing.  It made me smile.  I got my new gearbox & my car went from sounding like a dump truck with a sore throat in a meat grinder to being so quiet it could sneak up on Jackie Chan having a Who-Is-The-Quietest competition with Jet Li.  I’m serious.  It’s basically a ninja assassin.

Lord Of The Rings Style Redundant Superfluous Ending

The End.

So have you ever had a crappy run of luck?  Or a great run of luck?  Or one then the other?  Why not everyone know in the comments section?

Unless there is a next time,
Goodbye forever.

Luke Venables
Half Man, Half Cartoon


4 Responses to “Lord Of The Trips To Mackay: An Epic Journey”

  1. Mysterious Mystery Says:

    At least you didn’t have to wait till THIS weekend. The weather is a little …. inclement at the moment. (Hope all your family and friends in Mackay are gonna be okay and they don’t have any flood related tales of woe to tell by next week.) AND …. so it was YOU who held up the traffic! *glare*

  2. Lequoise Says:

    Luke…that was epic. And OMG MONKEY ISLAND! 😀 😀 😀 *collapse*

    I’m glad it all worked out in the end…I’ve had similar days where the entire universe seems to want you to fail. The only upside to those days is that I seem to lose weight out of sweat and anxiety.

    Huzzah for Ninja Car! Working gearboxes are beautiful things.

  3. I once fell slightly in love with an actress …. well for a half hour or so. She was the star of the show, and everybody wanted her, she was glamour and beauty personified, but she was MINE MINE MINE……. such epic luck!! – Then I got the clap. Is that the same thing?

  4. Gee…your #1 girl must be incredibly patient and understanding and awesome…

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